R Kelly Doubles Up, But Not In The Way You Might Think

R Kelly: Can you direct me to the lavatory?For a paedophile, R Kelly is doing pretty well. In fact, he not only pisses on his girlfriends, but he's pissing on the R&B competition too. His new album, the euphemistically titled Double Up is his eighth – eighth! --number one album. That's a lot of doo-doo butter.

Typically, the reviews have been glowing, with quite a few reputable US newspapers churning out a little bit of their own doo-doo butter. The New York Post obviously understands what Kelly means by Double Up when they say "Kelly's not only smooth enough for the ladies, but rough enough for the fellas…" The Philadelphia Inquirer have R Kelly confused with someone who works in a donut shop: "The album provides plenty of examples of the real reason that Kelly's career continues to thrive…he keeps serving up the hot jams."

And from the newspaper that broke the Watergate scandal, the Washington Post, we have this: "the microdramas are so masterfully executed that it's easy to forget how great the music is…" Indeed.