300 -- A his and hers
Claudia's new boyfriend
The Beige Baron suggested Claudia and I do a his and hers review a while ago. Today we saw the film 300.
Chuck: I couldn't sleep last night because I knew 300 was coming out today. I have been following the production blog of this film and have been watching the reaction from across the world. As a child I loved He-Man and wanted to be like him. As an adult I loved Dolph Lundgren and I wanted to be like him -- even act like him. 300 is the ultimate movie for buffness.
In the car going to Claudia's, I was wondering if she would want to go and see 300 with me. I knew she wouldn't but I thought I would ask anyway. She said no and said it would be like her asking me if I would sit through Anne of Green Gables or Pride and Prejudice. I told her the film would be great and she would enjoy it and that it would not be what she thought it would be like. No amount of persuasion could change her mind.Fast forward an hour later and we were at Borders in Chapel St. I was waiting for Claudia to choose a book and I could see the cinemas across the atrium beckoning me. I asked her again if she would see it and she said no way. It would be like torture for her. I then had an idea. One that turns everyone around. I decided to offer her a bribe. I said I would buy her the book of her choice. Her composure changed and there was a spark in her eye. She then bargained that I would also have to pay for her ticket. I was going to anyway so what the hell. I just gave her $50 and she said yes.
Should I give a synopsis about the film instead of about us? The film is an adaption of Frank Miller's graphic novel about the Battle of Thermoplae in 480 B.C. 300 Spartans lead by King Leonidas fight to the death against the million man army of the Persian King Xerxes (Rodrigo Santoro) who looks like a 20ft tall drag queen. Contrast this with modern film making via green screen and heavy metal music during spine-chilling battle scenes. The story is simple and it works.
300 has had a fair bit of hype around it and I was hoping it would live up to my expectations. From the opening scenes Claudia was giggling -- a good sign with her. The film doesn't muck around and I like that when you are going to see a film like this. It gets straight into the action without messing about setting up plots, sub-plots, background and antagonists. I don't have time for that nor do I want to pay for some sort of amateur hour or fuckwits in lead roles...aka Russell Crowe
I was blown away by the whole look of the film. What also carried the film was the lead character King Leonidas(Gerry Butler). He took the film to a whole new level. Fark. The guy is fantastic in this film. Move over everyone else in the holly of woods. Gerry is the man. He looks like the archetypal Greek god. Strong and charismatic. He has muscles on his muscles and his eyes are evidence that he can act. Geezus. He has the stare that could kill a man. It is worth the $15 to see Leonidas cut through the Persian army with a spear and sword.
The dialogue is short in 300 which works to its advantage. Leonidas is full of one line responses as opposed to the usual pep talks you see in Hollywood by leaders before a battle. "Tonight we dine in hell", is one good one. "We should have brought our women to fight instead," after destroying a few hundred Persians then driving them off a cliff.
Claudia enjoyed 300 more than I did. She can't stop taking about Gerry Butler and has been on the web researching him since. Lucky I don't any insecurities about myself. She says she loves him and I keep saying I told you so about the film. Did she want to see it all along and just get a free novel out of me?
Fuck the controversy and the whingeing Iranians we are going to see 300 again at iMax.
--
Claudia: The last film I wanted to see was one featuring ancient epic battle scenes, spears, shields, and men in sandals. I hate that shit. Images of Russell "hold the phone" Crowe sprang to mind as Chuck suggested we go see 300 this afternoon. He was met with an emphatic no.
Two hours later at Borders in Sth Yarra as I was desperately trying to find something, anything, to read. Chuck sidled up.
"I'll buy you any book you want if you come see 300 with me."
How could I resist that? I'm not made of stone! I finished agonising over which Coetzee novel I wanted and wondered if it's possible to read in the dark.
The lights dim and the screen becomes a magnificent painting; each scene a work of art. Mesmerised like a baby staring at a shiny bauble, I didn't actually follow the plot at first because the photography is so beautiful. Shadows, light, colour, surreal time-lapse, and then the story kicks in: brave men fighting for freedom and honour; ancient civilisations willing to defend what they believe to be good and right and true. And really hot guys in leather jocks.
Good grief. Gerard Butler makes an awesome, formidable Spartan king, whether it's spearing a Persian freak in the gullet or biting into a delicious apple he miraculously pulled from thin air (or was it down his jocks the whole time?) Like all good kings, he had a hint of madness in his eyes. Gerard's the epitome of masculinity. I don't normally go for manly men (insert joke about Chuck here) but these guys are as much a work of art as the film itself.
The battle scenes are spectacular, the allegory is important, and the energy highly contagious. You have to hold yourself back from wanting to cheer out loud every time they defeat the baddies. And they defeat them often. At first.
The enemy are freaks, literally portrayed as hunchbacks, lepers, or Priscilla queen of the desert. You hate them because, well, you just hate them because you want Gerard to win so he can go home and shag his missus again while you watch.
This film is the best thing to come out at the movies for a long time, Gerard is the best thing to come out of Scotland ever, and the only good thing to come out of Persia is a nice rug.
Golden review.
The two-part action is really nice. I would try it with my missus but mine would be a black-clothes wine drinker long worder (to borrow from the genius over at www.thesecretagent.com) and hers would be a one-liner. 'He stink' or 'It was boring'. Come to think of it, between me and my missus, she is the most likely to make it onto the jackets of DVDs. Except 'Good' and 'Was okay' don't usually make it onto jackets, despite the pithiness. I never saw 'Was Terrible, how could they make that?' on a Ben Affleck movie.
Nice work guys.
We are currently in the spiral of a Lost addiction. I am always so dismissive of American mystery/action dramas ala 24 and Lost. Then I see one episode on TV, then another, then the next thing I am haunting the video shop waiting for the next episode of the latest season to come out.
I have a feeling that the intruging story lines and epic backdrop are what draws my missus to Lost, though. Every bloke, even elderly ones, are rippling with muscles, can walk 500 miles with a bullet in their shoulder and wear nice raggedy clothing. I notice Shiz is particularly intent on these scenes.
But then I have Kate. Kate. Oh Kate.
My favourite character is Hurley though. The script is sharp-as.
Anyone else watching? Japan is 10 years behind the times here, Season 2 is on new release ATM.
Peace to the power of 9.
I will report back afterwards.
It scores 4 out of 10 on the Fruck-O-Meter.
And a 9.3 on the Contrary-O-Meter.
Do tell...
Not a fan Hans? It has had mixed reviews. I would give it 9/10.
I really liked this movie and I was entertained the whole way through. This rarely happens when I go to see a movie.
Did you like the oracle scene and how it was shot?
Did you like the scene when Leonidas fights his way through the enemy from the left of the screen to the right of the screen?
I have not seen Lost Baron. Is it like Twin Peaks?
What I liked
Some of the visuals (I won't call it cinematography because so much of it was done via computer). Some of it was beautiful -- not so much the battle scenes, which I thought were a bit repetitive, but sequences such as the oracle scene and the shot of the Persian emissaries galloping over the hillcrest toward Sparta. That stuff was breathtaking, and the film's fascination with the play of light and wind on fabric was like watching a CGI version of a John Woo film.
What I didn't like
Script
Acting
Politics
What I thought was funny (but fascinating, all the same)
Like a lot of films that glamorise war and warriors, it's about as camp as a fashion show. This may be intentional, but I suspect it more likely results from a galumphing lack of self-awareness.
PS: As someone who loved Spartacus ("I am Spartacus!") when I was a kid, I'm happy to see sword-and-sandal epics making a comeback. I like Gladiator and I like Kingdom of Heaven too. So I'm not against this kinda film -- I just don't think much of 300.
PPS: Of cpurse, different strokes for different folks. You and Clauds would probably laugh your arses off at some of the films l like -- which is all good (where would we all be if we weren't laughing at each other?)
Claudia and I also thought the battle scenes were a bit repetitive. Once you have seen one or two you have seen them all in this film. The whole buffness/campness thang was funny. Everything was hyper exaggerated. Claudia was laughing a fair bit in 300.
I guess what the Fruckmeister didn't like about the film I did. I am a sucker for this shit. I thought some lines from the Persian emissaries sounded very familiar.
At least Claudia does not have a thing for Detective Goren anymore. She said "Gerry Butler is my new Goren." Which is a relief to me as I did not think Vincent D'Onofrio was deserving of Claudia's eye.
**This guys thinks 300 "would have Herodotus turning in his grave and Hitler rising from his. It is violent enough to make you shudder and close enough to fascist art to make your skin crawl. It celebrates all the things the Fuehrer loved - the glorious, operatic spectacle of senseless death, the ruthless weeding out of the weak, the gross caricaturing of the enemy, the indoctrination of the young, even a mountain-climbing ordeal for the hero - and all as it purports to be a movie about freedom."
I would argue the exact opposite. It is the enemy (Muslim extremists) who are the far right fascists.
Geezus. Why do the far left think that the USA is the equivalent to Hitler's Nazi Germany when Hitler was best friends with Haj Amin Husseini an Arab Mufti and who did a deal with Hitler to join forces and every Jew in the Middle East. Anti-Semitic aresholes.
Fuck The Age and its "doublespeak".
or perhaps some international velvet?
I would argue the exact opposite. It is the enemy (Muslim extremists) who are the far right fascists.
Geezus. Why do the far left think that the USA is the equivalent to Hitler's Nazi Germany when Hitler was best friends with Haj Amin Husseini an Arab Mufti and who did a deal with Hitler to join forces and every Jew in the Middle East. Anti-Semitic aresholes.
Fuck The Age and its "doublespeak".
I think he makes solid points, Chuck. The stuff about historical inaccuracies isn't substantive, and he admits as much, but the rest of it rings true IMO.
The conclusion that Sparta = the US, and Leonidas = Bush is pretty unavoidable. I also agree with him when he says that the depiction of the Spartans is steeped in a bug-eyed worship of fascism (though the filmmakers seem to dim to perceive it).
Anyway, footy's about to start, so I have to go. We can continue to argue at a later point.
Anyway, footy's about to start, so I have to go. We can continue to argue at a later point.
Cool. I have to go an hide Easter Eggs and then prepare for Jesus' return on Monday.
Merry Easter
Sparta = the US? Nothing could be further from the truth. Leonidas was a brave warrior. George Bush is a slimy coward. Sparta was a minority nation under the threat of invasion. Comparing them to the US, or worse, the Nazis is ridiculous. As I understand it, Nazi Germany was never under any threat of invasion--it did the invading. The US is not a minority nation facing a formidable enemy against all odds; it's a wealthy, powerful force bullying its way around the present day war arena.
Leonidas represents any person faced with the threat to submit to those who seek to oppress and tyrannize. There are many parallels in history for this story, drawing the Bush/US conclusion is illogical. There were 300 Spartans facing the million-man army. How does that fit the US/Iraq analogy? It doesn't. How does a King defending his country from invasion equate to fascism? If anything, the fascists are doing the invading. The Persian King saw himself as God. If this story were told from the point of view of the Persians and their attempt to dominate the world, would the critics be calling them the fascists?
True, but we're not talking about your view of George Bush, or mine. We're talking about the view of American right-wingers, and to them, George Bush is a "brave warrior". Have you seen that pic of Bush dressed in a flightsuit striding across the flightdeck of a US aircraft carrier just prior to declaring "mission accomplished"?
Your logic is impeccable. But again, this is a film that is promoting and catering to the ideological perspective of the American right wing. Much like columnists such as Janet Albrechtsen and Miranda Devine in Australia, these bedwetters are terribly, terribly afraid of brown-skinned Middle Easterners. They feel besieged and under threat of imminent attack from the "Islamofascists". I've heard and read some of their hysterical, paranoid and unhinged rants on the threat of Islam and the "clash of civilisations", and despite being citizens of the only superpower on the planet, they feel very fearful and vulnerable. And they do feel as if the US stands alone against a world that is either indifferent or hostile. Therefore, the fact that, in reality, the Spartans were outnumbered and the US aren't doesn't invalidate the parallel, because we're talking about a particular right-wing view that bears little resemblance to reality.
But it's not as if those who see the Bush/US analogy are picking it at random. After all, what's the single most inflammatory and polarising thing happening in the world today? Isn't it the US occupation of Iraq? Therefore, it's topical. That's why viewers have drawn that conclusion, and equally, that's why the filmmakers have -- in my opinion -- embedded that analogy in the film. It has direct application to arguably the most important thing happening in the world today.
I don't think the analogy is, or was intended to be, a perfect one-to-one analogy of Bush/US versus Saddam/Iraq. It's more general than that, more a case of Bush/US versus Islam/Middle East. I mean, sure, the US is in Iraq, but they're also in Afghanistan and have designated Iran (Persia) part of the Axis of Evil. So what we're currently seeing isn't simply a conflict between Iraq and the US. It's a broader-based conflict, and it's in that sense that the analogy the film draws is most coherent.
Even fascists can defend their countries.
From Wikipedia:
Wikipedia gets to the nub of it. Fascism is an ideology that demands brutal submission of the individual to the state. In order to achieve this kind of hive-mind collectivism it almost always deploys extreme nationalism and militarism -- both evident in the depiction of Sparta in 300.
Clearly, the filmmakers didn't intend Leonidas or the Spartans to be seen as fascists. As you say, they intended us to see them as brave and indomitable. But Frank Miller is so romanced by all those hard bodies that he fetishises soldiers, militarism, and violence in general, and this fetishisation is one of the hallmarks of fascism. It idealises strength, feats of arms, and absolute submission of the individual, whether it's to the state, in Sparta, or the king, in Leonidas.
The freedom that the characters are always crapping on about clearly isn't the freedom of the individual, but rather the freedom of the state, because the individual is anything but free in Sparta. Others may disagree, but to my mind, Sparta is depicted fairly straightforwardly and approvingly as a proto-fascist state.
And in 300 Miller, knowingly or not, deploys all sorts of tropes that have been co-opted in the past by fascists. First, there's eugenics, namely killing deformed infants. Then there's the brutalisation of children until they're honed into a race of buffed superheroes. Miller even, as the SMH reviewer notes, makes use of mountain-climbing imagery.
Now, let's boil it down: eugenics, indoctrination of children, buff superheroes, and mountain-climbing? That's a pretty snug fit with Nazi policy, Hitler Youth, the Ubermensch, and Leni Reifenstahl's films (which repeatedly used the mountain-climbing motif).
And as so often seems to be the case in films that are besotted with militarism and depictions of male power, 300 is unmistakably homoerotic. It wants to celebrate (heterosexual) male strength. To that end, the Spartans are manly men; they crack jokes about Athenian boylovers; and their adversary, Xerxes, is a transvestite, who rather suggestively demands that Leonidas kneel before him. The message is clear: the Spartans are he-men; everyone else is, well, kinda gay.
But so in thrall are Miller and company to all those washboard stomachs and leather-clad crotches that celebration turns into masturbation. Rarely in cinematic history has the male physique been so objectified. Never have so many phallic spears been thrust into so many male bodies. And that gap in the mountains they're defending? What's it called: the Hot Gates?
The people who came up with this film should be in therapy because, I tell ya, they're really mixed up. They wanna be Leonidas, they wanna kill the gays attempting to jump Leonidas, and at the same time they can't stop thinking about... Leonidas' hot wife? (And if you believe that, I've got a pyramid scheme you might be interested in.)
I've digressed. Let me get back on track. I want to be really clear what I'm arguing here: this isn't a criticism of Spartan culture. A) I don't know much about ancient Sparta; B) I don't know how accurately it's been depicted; and C) perhaps all that brutality was justified in ancient Greece -- I don't know. What I'm criticising is how Miller, Snyder and company are using Sparta and Leonidas as a thinly disguised analogy for the US and Bush. I'm also criticising the fascist form that this pro-Bush sentiment takes. In my opinion, they're cynically or ignorantly -- place your bets -- tapping into all sorts of unappetising racial, religious and political undercurrents.
I guess fascists can fight each other.
But the reason critics have more readily identified Sparta, and not Persia, as fascist in 300 is precisely because of the fascist iconography that Miller uses to depict Sparta, which I mentioned above. I don't think the connection between the Persians and fascism is as clear. For instance, Persia is an empire. (From memory, someone mentions the thousand nations of the Persian Empire, or something like that.) Also, Xerxes travels with a bunch of deformed "freaks". Two of the things that fascism generally aspires to are racial purity and physical perfection -- in the case of Hitler's Germany, anyway. On both counts, the Sparta depicted in the film seems a better fit than Persia does.
Finally, in addition to all my other objections, I just don't think 300 is a good film. After lavishing the "look" of 300 with inordinate amounts of sophistication and care, Miller, Snyder and company apparently had none to spare for their script. And the less said about the acting the better.
Chuck and Claudia, I have enjoyed the argument. Peace.
-Hans
PS: I should add that, yes, I realise Miller wrote his "graphic novel" in '98, a full two years before Bush came to office. But that doesn't change my mind. Fact is, the film was made recently, after Bush had taken office, after 9-11, and after Iraq. Therefore I take it to be informed by all these events. Even if you discount the Bush analogy (and I don't), the film's still steeped in fascist imagery and still espouses retrograde "clash of civilisations" nonsense. That is, Bush analogy or not, it's still a beleaguered West under attack by inhuman brown-skinned hordes.
That is, of course, only my opinion.
Hey Hans. Although I can see your position on this one, I do not see the Bush analogy in 300. I see the fascist analogy though. Militant, extremist Islam and Sharia Law.
I am not one to label every brown-skinned Muslim an extremist, but it is undeniable that there is an effort by Jihadists across the world to attack those who are not Muslim (and even those who are).
The modern day 'fascism' or to go even further 'Nazism' is a perverse form of Islam which has as its foundations:
1. A pathological hatred of Jews
2. Submission to the one 'perfect' law (Sharia law)
3. Submission to Allah (the State).
This version of Islam is violent, menacing, backwards in its beliefs, racist, demonises woman, those who do not believe in it and a danger to people who believe in freedom of the individual.
As far as the Spartans and the "brutalisation of children until they're honed into a race of buffed superheroes" goes I don't see it as Nazi eugenics. Any modern army has its equivalent of an elite fighting force. We have the SAS for example. To get into the SAS you have to go through a huge selection process that sorts the strong from the weak. Nothing much has changed in that sense except the age to try out is age 17 instead of 7. You get taken away from your family, you get sent out on your own (no wolves though), you get bashed, you get tortured, you get taught how to survive, you get taught how to fight. If you make it through the selection process you come out one buff, tough, mean bastard. Survival of the fittest maybe but nothing Nazi like about it.
Throwing the deformed babies off cliffs, while harsh, was a reality for a small nation like Sparta who could not support the whole population. Persia on the other hand was huge and could support all those it enslaved.
The West is under attack by extremists whether they be brown, white, black, purple or pink. This is a fact. The West is also under attack by the apathy of the left who spend their whole time hating Amerika instead of those it should be fighting against. The real racist, homophobic, fascist and violent cowards -- Muslim extremists. The fact that they are mostly brown is inconsequential.
I believe it is something to be scared about. Very scared. You just have to watch planes being flown into the WTC or people whose faces are burnt off from the London tube bombing or the two hundred dead in Spain or the almost 100 Australians killed just off our shores in Bali or the school children massacred in Beslan or the foiled plots in Melbourne and Sydney or the suicide attacks in Pakistan, India, Thailand and Somalia -- all by terrorists who are doing it in the name of their faith which is Islam.
Granted there is plenty of other bad shit going on in the world but this shit is coming to our shores. I believe it. I don't need some moron like Devine or Albrechsten to tell me so.
I don't believe my view is right wing. I believe it is a realist point of view. This is why I liked 300 and the message it sends to me. Fuck racism, fuck submission, fuck the enslavement of women and fight till the death for honourable values instead of cowardly ones that extremists fight/die for.
If there ever if a modern battle field that is far away from civilians, woman and children and the enemy is religious extremists I will re-enlist in the Army and fight for what I believe in.
Will I be buff? I hope so. Will I be gay? No. Although I love the look of the classic male figure (Greek & Roman).
It is funny the different views we can have but still be on the same page about a lot of things.
Peace out brother.
*Edit after posting
The closest thing I have seen to a propaganda/Leni Reifenstahl/Goebbels film in recent times is from the left. Fahrenheit 9/11 by Michael Moore was the biggest lie in recent times. It is not about what he put in -- it is about what left out. I am no Bush fan but geezus. Although it might have served a good purpose in nearly helping Bush lose the election, it was dodgy propaganda.
On this point, we're in complete agreement.
I've read your "303" post three times from start to finish. I agree with parts of it, but -- and this won't surprise anyone, least of all you -- I vehemently disagree with most of it.
There are so many things I'd like to write in response that I seriously don't know where to begin. And the thing is, I reckon it's probably best if I don't begin, because I don't know how to continue this argument without everyone involved getting really, really pissed off.
So, I think I'll just let it lie. But I couldn't let the conversation end without saying, for the record, I disagree with you.
And now that I've done that, I figure we can amicably go our separate ways.
That's cool Hans. I understand completely. I wasn't going to write 303 but I thought I should just so you could see where I stood.
It is a polarising issue and here probably aint the best forum for it. It can get too heated and why should we be pissed off? We are just dudes going about our daily business trying to get through life.
The old cliche springs forth, "agree to disagree".
I won't do a George Bush and fan the flames any further with this but I'd just like to add that any country -- be that Sparta, Australia, Iran, US, or even tiny Nauru -- has the right to defend itself from enemy invasion. This is definitely not about how deep your tan is.
If someone comes banging on your door demanding you let them in so they can re-arrange your furniture you should make it crystal clear that they are not welcome.
This film tells the story of a battle that happened long ago. A time when ancient Greece was under threat from the superpower of the day. Comparing Leonidas to Bush is an insult to a great king. George Bush is not a great leader no matter how elastic your imagination is. He will not be remembered for anything other than his deceitful, cowardly acts.
But I guess this comes down to what you perceive the filmmakers' intentions to be. I see it as a re-enactment of history done in a cool, comic-book style featuring typical comic-book heroes. If it's intended as a metaphor for the current US/Middle East situation, then I'm not buying into the propaganda, whether from the left wing or right wing view. In my opinion, this is the story of Sparta telling Persia to fuck off, plain and simple.
Peace out.
At my request, Bad Boy Benny has added a sitemeter to BNU at the bottom of the page. We used a sitemeter on the old version of the website. But we didn't bother adding one when we moved to the current Drupal version of the site because Drupal helpfully records some of this traffic information by itself. The Drupal stats aren't quite as helpful or user-friendly as sitemeter, so we've added a sitemeter again.
So for the curious or statistically minded among you, check it out.
Is the the coolest. But I think the window looks shitty on the front page. So if you wanna post a YouTube thing, just ramble on for a while, post a picture and break it so the YouTube window doesn't appear on the front page.
It looks shitty. I am sorry to be anal but once you watch the clip, you gotta see some grainy lump of crap on the front page.
So let's break them from now on?
Code is <!--break-->
Cool.
code is (no spaces in this code, it disappears if I run it as is)
< ! -- break -- >
It looks shitty. I am sorry to be anal but once you watch the clip, you gotta see some grainy lump of crap on the front page.
Says the dude who posted a picture showing Oliveri's nutsack.
PS: That's cool. I'm kidding.
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